So often I have been approached by couples wanting to change their partners. They so badly just want their ‘other half’ to just get it. That is try to see the issue their way.
Typically when there are issues in the relationship they want their partner to come for counselling. If you were to use the Gottman model you might suggest that they have ‘contempt’ for their partner.
I have also found that many couples don’t come to counselling because they are worried of the stigma coming for help may hold when describing their relationship. Some cliché’s may say that the marriage is on the rocks, that their is a domestic crisis in the home.
The way I have seen it in the counselling room that whenever couples come together it is an opportunity to enhance their relationship. If you were to ask most couples if there was an opportunity to strengthen and better their relationship experience would they respond. Most have answered yes to me and have found huge benefits in their relationship when they work on improving their communication skills. Gottman would also suggest that conflicts in a relationship are inevitable so why not try to find ways to do conflict better.
For a couple to attend an enhancement opportunity whether it’s two or four sessions it often provides a great opportunity to enrich the family experience. Happy relationship…happy couple…happy children etc.
If you have more questions about what I am talking about or would like to enquire about my couples’ package please contact me at my Surrey practice at Shawn McNabb Counselling , 778-773-2465.